Our parents... miss us?
- bookandteagirl
- Oct 15, 2025
- 2 min read

What do you mean, I have to make an effort to see my parents? I went from bumping into them in the kitchen to scheduling coffee dates to catch up. I don´t know whether they have plans for the weekend, unless I call them.
Moving out on your own brings many changes, and most of them you see coming, but sometimes they arrive in a slightly different package. For example, the change in the relationship with your parents.
I didn´t expect my presence to actually be missed.
This sounds as if my parents were barely noticing me, which is entirely untrue - trust me, it´s hard to look past me, both mentally and physically - but I didn´t think they would MOURN me.
When I come back home, I receive strange looks that are a mix of happiness and sadness. I was peacefully eating my pasta once, and my dad put a hand on my shoulder and said, "It´s good to see you sitting at your usual spot."
Or my aunt told me that my mom said to her, "It´s weird not to have her around; she made it so peaceful to live here." I´m not sure how, since I was either blasting my white American dad playlist, recording loud voice messages to my friends, bickering with my brother, or playing instruments. But apparently, I was a peacecreator.
I called my father the other day, but he stopped me before I could say anything, insisting that he needed to put me on a speaker so the whole family could hear it. Like I´m some bloody British queen giving her Christmas speech!
It´s weird to have this kind of attention or be shown so many emotions.
I also have to treat my mom like a friend! We were used to having a friendly relationship, but this is on a whole different level. We have to PLAN to actually see each other.
I went swimming with my brother a week ago, and at the end of it, we didn´t know what to do. Should we show emotions? We are siblings, that´s not what we do. But then again, now we´re adults, so we should show our emotional maturity.
We bumped fists, like the bros we are.
It feels very adult to have such a relationship with my family. And a bit godlike, because you are lured with goodies to come home, your presence is suddenly sacred, and it´s a special occasion for them when you see them.
It feels strange, but also like something I´ll eventually get used to. In the meantime, I guess I´ll be the praised goddess of our household!
Love,
Book and Tea Girl



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