Bloody emotional

Forget Edward, because Vlad is the new vampire boyfriend aspiration. Dracula: A Love Tale really stood up to its name, because it was a HELL of a love tale. Vlad Dracula took yearning to another level and raised the standards so high, I can´t even see them with a telescope.

A remake of Dracula from 1992 turns a sadistic, manipulative bat into a charismatic, romantic prince. The movie begins by portraying a relationship between Vlad and Elisabeta through raw and intense scenes that range from cute to sexual to weird. But there´s no denying it tells the story without saying a word.

Elisabeta´s gown is so spectacular, I was left speechless. You´ll notice throughout the film that the costume department definitely DID their homework and enhanced the atmosphere with the most stunning clothes. They even nailed an armour design!

I wouldn´t think that a Romanian accent could sound sexy, but Caleb Landry Jones sure knows how to make it so. The plot is basically the same as Bram Stoker´s original Dracula from 1897, minus three wives and Vlad being an asshole.

The atmosphere reminded me of Guillermo del Toro´s movies, with its emphasis on vibrant colours and beautifully directed scenes. One scene in particular got stuck in my mind.

It was a montage of Vlad visiting different European courts, where one could guess the courts by their fashion, and the guests danced to dramatic music. Dracula himself had different hairstyles, moustaches, and clothes. The cuts were smooth and the atmosphere irreplaceable.

The music throughout the movie is a very important element. I thought to myself, this soundtrack is genius, who wrote it? When I saw the name Danny Elfman in the credits, I couldn´t help but smile to myself. Of COURSE he was the author of the soundtrack.

He wrote one of my favourite piano scores, Piano Duet from Corpse Bride. He´s also an author of music for The Nightmare Before Christmas, Edward Scissorhands, Good Will Hunting, Men in Black, Wednesday, and much more.

He has a talent for writing melancholic, nostalgic scores with a hint of romance, the unfortunate kind. What a way to go, drama queen!

It perfectly underlines the yearning of Dracula. He literally waits 400 years for his wife to be reborn. He travels all the continents, develops an addictive perfume (that one was an interesting side quest), and tries to kill himself many times just so he doesn´t have to live in a world without his love.

When they´re finally reunited, he doesn´t even try to take her away and have an uninterrupted sex session for days that one would think would happen when a person meets their true love after 400 years. He just accompanies her, smiles at her and doesn´t try to touch her. And when she asks him to leave, he does so without hesitation.

And when he says, I have waited almost 400 years to see you again, so if you want me to leave, I can?!?! Like, GET A ROOM!

I obviously cried in the end, but what surprised me was that I also cried during the movie at not exactly sad parts. It was just so emotional, pure and raw, I couldn´t contain the feeling that got over me.

But don´t worry, you´ll also get a few laughs. Christopher Waltz has some comedic elements about him, and some scenes are downright ridiculous.

If you´re ready for your heart to be shattered, your standards for relationships to get high, your eyes to be sore from the crying, find the nearest screening time and get your ass to the cinema.

Love,

Book and Tea Girl